Showerpress

So I found this book lying around at home:

I thought it might fun to try and answer them all in less than 160 characters.  Yeah I might need to work on my definition of ‘fun’…

~

If I borrow a million pounds am I a millionaire?
Everything devalues with time, including money.  Therefore ‘millionaire’ must refer to immediate access to funds, >1million.  So yes, you are.

If you were identified as being genetically inclined to do bad things should you be locked up before you do them?
Everyone is inclined to do bad things; they had to say ‘inclined’ because certainty implies a hard determinism, and places too much emphasis on genetics.  No.

If I say ‘I have a pound’ (because I felt a pound in my pocket) but when I take it out it’s actually a button, but then I found a pound (in another pocket), was I right or wrong in saying ‘I have a pound’ in the first place?
Question of semantics.  Depends on what you meant by ‘I have a pound’.  Better to ask; “What matters most, intent or interpretation?” They are both the same.

Could you invent a time machine that moved you forward in time at one minute per minute?
Time is an arbitrary measurement of causality.  Time travel means to subjectively  slow or quicken.  A machine which doesn’t change things in this way?  Toaster.

Does your dog/cat/horse love you the way you love it?
‘It’! No.  ‘ “I love you” is a clumsy shorthand for many things that I do not know how else to word’. Love is never the same, even if you happen to be a horse.

A wise man once said “Love, and do as you wish”. Would that be a good way to lead your life?
If ‘love’ equals compassion absolutely.  It’s not perfect, but morality based on compassion is fairly indisputable.  It’s not possible of course, rather an aim.

Could you pretend to love someone? If you were good at it, would they ever no you were pretending?
No and yes.  Let’s not cry deception though, but misjudgment. There isn’t much difference between the pretense and the actuality anyway.

What would be worse, a world without love or a world full of hate (or are they the same thing)?
Of course neither is possible, a world without love more so.  The hate will dissolve over time, but ‘nothing from nothing comes’.

~

This is getting boring.  The next 3 will be answered with (terrible) haikus

~

Could a fly cause an aeroplane to crash?
Wings beat on wings span,
Prismed clouds chop and flutter-
Bang, crash, “Hello John…”

Is there more future or past?
Sticky wax dribbles,
Melting today, maybe
Morning or evening.

Can you be ‘best friends’ with more than one person? If so, what is the maximum number of best friends you can have?
Monkey-sphere blossoms,
Facebook request accepted
Bored of your status.

~

The next section is disrespectful of the Zen Kōan tradition…

~

Can you have a friend you don’t like?
Every flower befriends bees and Victorian maidens.

Would you rather be a brave fool or a clever coward?
John Stewart Mill just wanted Socratic Capitalization; the fools and cowards outsmart, scare each-other.

Which is more important, being right or being nice?
A pretty cloud is both right and nice.

~

Bored.

~

Is a wooden table still a tree?
Insofar as I’m the sun, why naturally. But it’s so hard to see, we rarely feel like the air from which we come.  A little less collective scoffing is needed…